Too much cheese can ruin a pizza

Hello, beautiful people. What's up? I'm still alive, only I haven't been updating as often as usual. Life is crazy, makes me restless and out of words. I doubt you wanna hear job related stories about me almost stabbing a client's legal department woman with a paper clip for always bringing me expired documents and complicates everything when I just try to do my job, or how it always amuses me whenever my biggest boss is angry (just not to me please) she screams "shieeeeeeeeet" a lot.

Those are pretty interesting stories actually, maybe I'll write about them next time. I have something bigger in mind for today.

I'm quite disappointed with Eclipse. Gloat, Twi-Haters, gloat. I wonder is it the director or something, I don't recall the book being this bad. HOW COME THE MOVIE IS SO MUCH CHEESIER THAN THE BOOK? How come the first two movies, dialogue-wise, are less revolting? Harry Potter series progressed through out the movies, how come Twilight Saga aren't? Here are a few things that bug me:

• Bella Swan. Is it just me, or is she portrayed MUCH sluttier in the movie? Maybe it's just the fact that I feel like vomiting every time I see Kristen "Sourpuss" Stewart, I don't know. But she seems needier, sluttier in the movie. Sure, in the book we can tell that she, in a way, likes and wants Jacob the Abs Monster around but she didn't throw herself at him like this. Not this obvious, at least.

• Speaking of Bella and Jacob, does anyone remember that in the forth book (*SPOILER*), Jacob would imprint on Bella and Edward's DAUGHTER??? From the moment she was born, by the way, and SNAP SNAP SNAP, Bella who? Bella, I wanna make your baby my bride. How DISTURBING is that? After all the longing and emoness he's shown just to get it on with Little Miss Sourpuss? After all of those macho staring contest with the world's favorite brooding fictional vampire? Gross.

• All the final battle scenes should be cool enough. Come on, they have racked enough money from the first two movies right? They should have made it much more...grandeur or something. The dead vampires looked exactly like broken vases. Where are the deadly combats? Fire? Explosions, maybe?
  

• The new Victoria? Whatever her real name is, I don't feel her at all. She does not have the evil sexiness that the old Victoria (Rachelle Lefevre) had.

• Too much cheese in every scene. I know Twilight Saga is supposed to be cheesy, but in this movie? Is it necessary to make every scene a lovey dovey scene? More fights, more history, please. You can so tell they wanna sell more sex in Eclipse. The movie is practically about Bella wanting to go ride on that vampire stick. Excuse my lingo.

So yeah, I don't really like it. I only stayed in my seat because of Jacob's abs, the almost-as-awesome wolf pack's abs, and Emmett-Alice-Jasper Cullen. They're cooler in this movie. Oh, and Jacob's abs. Again. Because I REALLY think all men in the world should have a similar work out routine.

Ladies if you feel me say "woooyeah".