Sorry for the short, melodramatic post earlier, friends. I was going to post a real post, but I was just feeling overwhelmed & had a headache, and I just wanted to tell/ask someone to pray for me.
So today, I finished up Perelandra and started on College Ministry 101. Both hurt my head a little bit.
Perelandra, the 2nd in Lewis's space trilogy, is not as engrossing a story as Out of the Silent Planet is, but, at least for me, had many more spiritual ideas to think about. As in OOTSP, Lewis's descriptions can be a bit heavy-handed and long-winded, so much so that I ended up skipping most of the last 12 pages or so. The book is very short, and I think that it would have been better served to not put the ending at the front of it. It isn't really all that dramatic, and then, at the end, it just is kind of over.
One of the things I'm trying to embrace is the Lady's view of going with the flow of what God brings to you, and not holding on to the idea of the Good you wanted or had, but enjoying the Good he's brought to you. I'm going to try to look at most things I have and most situations I'm in as Good things that I can be thankful for and embrace, not longing for the past or a concept I had of what I thought I wanted.
The college ministry book stresses me out. It has lots of amazing concepts, but I feel like I'm just learning all the things we (as a church) have done wrong and that it all needs to change. *sigh* At least I'm not alone at all in this task. I'm just afraid that we're going to have to do a major gear change or dismantle the scaffolding we've put up. But maybe not. We'll see. I'm just trying to assimilate all of these ideas and figure out how to filter them down in a way that can be passed on to my teammates.
Other than that, I'm still on an emotional roller coaster, which I'll tell you more about tomorrow, perhaps. In the meantime, I'm excited about being home from the relatives and being out of school. Tomorrow I plan on a run and CLEANING! It will be quite, quite, very, mucho exciting.
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