See? It happened again.

I start reading one of the ministry books, and I get about 1 page in before my mind starts whirring.  I stop to ponder; I create scenarios in my mind; I come up with ideas. 
So, as I tried to read more of College Ministry 101, I had to stop after a couple pages.  Too many ideas.  Too many thoughts about specific people. 

I love them too much.  And I know one of them is reading this- Hi, girly.  I love you and I want your faith to be strong and I want to encourage you to fight through the hard times and figure out what you should hold on to and what you need to let go of. 

I want others to figure out who the heck they are and stop wandering sooner than later.  I don't want to force anyone.  I don't want to guilt.  I want to walk with people.  I want to be an example.  Sometimes I just don't know what to do.

I've been lax in my writing exercises

But not in my physical exercises, I can assure you.
Nor in my homework duties.
You see, I've just been burnt out these past 2 weeks from class.  30 hours of class in two weeks + 1200 pages of reading + my other class reading & homework + figuring out paper topics + searching/buying/checking out books for said papers.

Thus?  My brain is mush when I get home and I haven't felt like turning the computer on and blogging at night.  I'm sorry.  I don't apologize to you, because I know you're cool with it, but I apologize to my future self and its writing abilities.

To celebrate diminished brain powers and lack of writing finesse, I shall pretend that this blog is my twitter feed and just blurt out some of my thoughts.  Enjoy!

• I'm reading Chi Running and worked on my form a little bit yesterday.  Well, a lot.  A planned 30 minute, light run to work on form turned into an hour and a half or so of being lost, being hot, having to poop, worrying about the dog, backtracking, resting in a park, and finally asking for directions.  My time was still pretty good, though, and I'm not very sore today, so I think the form worked.
• I think I'm going to do my first paper on Manifestations/Representation/? of the Trinity in The Chronicles of Narnia. So, I'm kind of skimming my way through them right now.  
• My right butt cheek hurts.
• I'm glad to be back in Sonoma County after being away for all of this week and most of last week.
• We didn't have the DVR set to keep more than one episode of So You Think You Can Dance, so we have to watch Wednesday's ep online, but I already know who went home on Thursday.
• You know what my 4 bookcases look like, yes?  Well, I currently also have 7 books on the back of the couch, one on the end table behind me, one pile of 13 on the kitchen table, another pile of 5 on the table, 6 on top of the bookcase in the kitchen, and I returned 8 to the library earlier.  Almost all of the books mentioned were/are for school.  
• I'm really really in the mood to go to Southern California.  Hmmm...one more...
• I love my life:  being in school, being in ministry, being in California, being in love, being in shape.  It's all good.

Oh, I do that.

Oftentimes, when people watch musicals they think, "Who does that?  Who bursts into song for no good reason?"  I think this all the time, too.  I'm really not a very big fan of musicals because I find them quite painful.

But I do burst into song for no good reason.  I sing about dinner, I sing to my husband (yes, he sings back), and today I sang about brushing my teeth.  I am one of those people. 

The difference is that I don't have serious conversations in song.  No marital spats, theological debates, or really anything that would take stomping, furrowing the brow, or pointing a finger while doing either of those things.  I am not Jean Valjean (24601).  I don't comfort my friends with heartfelt ballads about the pain they're going through.  (Okay, maybe I'd do this, but only to get a laugh out of them at the right time.) 

Perhaps I'm in a light-hearted musical about daily, domestic life.  I'll watch out for my dogs secretly practicing synchronized moves to complement my twirls and flourishes. 

Today? Oh, it was mediocre

I was up till past 5freaking30 this morning, so I ended up skipping church, which I guess was okay because I missed all the Father's Day whoo-hah.  After attempting to call my own dear father, I went back to bed. 

But I did buy him a book!  I bought him the audio version of The UltraMind Solution on iTunes, because I'm really digging on it and I think my parents will, too.  This book is blowing my mind, and part of me can't wait to try the dietary changes the author recommends because he makes it seem like magical fairy dust will come down and everything will be better. 

Believe me, I'm going into it with skepticism and not a ton of enthusiasm, because I'm not particularly excited about giving up gluten & dairy, if even for 6 weeks.  But if I see a change, you know I'll tell you about it.   Everything this guy is saying makes a lot of sense:  that our medical practices have gotten all out of whack and that we now treat every part of our bodies as completely separate and disconnected from the rest, and then we throw different pills at each part whenever something goes wrong.  He posits that our diets are so dysfunctional that many many of our ailments, both physical and psychological, would be greatly improved, if not cured, by taking better care of ourselves, with the chief manner being a change of diet.

Like Pollan & Schlosser, he says tat we eat entirely too much processed food that is lacking in basic nutrients.  The FDA guidelines for vitamins and minerals really only get us to a survival level, not a place where our bodies are healthy and thriving. 

I'm excited about this approach because I have noticed and lamented the fact that I could make a fairly long list of things that are amiss in my body, and in Seth's.  I'm entirely too young to have a laundry list of medical problems and not wanting to bring them up to the doctor because I don't want to have to get one more prescription. 

So, I read the book.  The author repeats himself a lot, and I'm skimming a lot, partially because he doesn't really have to convince me and I'm not wowed by his illustrations of lipids and cell walls.  At times, it feels a little like a horoscope, in that he's casting such a wide net that everyone would have to say yes to some things in his checklists.  The thing is that I find myself wanting to check off nearly everything in his list of woes, and I do believe that medication mainly addresses symptoms instead of causes.

I suspect that, starting in July, we're going to be eating very differently, at least for a while.  And we'll see how it goes.  I really want it to help with a lot of things, because that will be our impetus to continue eating healthily. 

Hugs, friends!  Tomorrow I keep reading this book & I'll probably read the C.S. Lewis one I have up there on my Good Reads list.  I don't remember exactly which one it is, so you'll have to look up & slightly to the right. 

Gah

Sometimes.  Once in a while.  Not often.  But often enough to bug me. 


I want a baby.



But I am 35.  I was told this would happen.  And I was told I'd get over it.  And I always knew that, should I not get over it, we can adopt. 


Sometimes I don't want to adopt.  I want Seth's baby.  But I also want a Haitian baby. 

Of course, I realized earlier that I've been thinking about doing an internship at a Mexican orphanage, so it will probably be a Mexican baby/kid.  That's cool, too.  Probably even better. 

I don't want to talk about it.  You'll know if anything really changes. 


And, seriously, it's like once every 2 weeks or something that I think I want a baby.  I am a human being, you know.  Thought it doesn't twitch often, I do have a uterus. 

Baby Steps

As you may or may not know, I spend entirely too much time online.  Really, I spend entirely too much time in this here green, corduroy chair.  So, after using online timers and a variety of site blockers, I have taken the step of putting my computer in the dining room.  Since it's less comfy, I don't want to spend as much time there, and when I need to do homework, I have more room and can concentrate more.

Now, it's a laptop, so you'd think that this isn't that strong of an incentive to stay on task, but it's working.  I set up space at the table, and I leave my cord in there, so that if I want to spend a long time on the computer, I'll have to sit there.  Sure, I can bring the thing in here for a while, but I won't bring the cord, which shortens the length of my stay in cyberspace.

But, Robin, you say, couldn't you just turn off your wireless?  Yes, and I can also turn it back on.  Besides, I can find all sorts of creative ways to spend time on the computer that don't necessarily involve facebook or twitter.  The latest time-sucker?  Mint.com coupled with Dave Ramsey's FPU budgeting tools online.  We have a lot of money this month, so I've been doing a lot of fiddling with the budget.  "Oh, well now this came."  "But this isn't realistic.  I'll make a normal month's budget."  "Oh, but this should be tweaked."  "Ooh!  You can split up the Costco bill into different categories!" 

Hours of fun. 

Even before this foray into money wrangling, I could spend, oh, two hours easily fiddling with music.  Listening to recommended music, searching for new music, downloading free songs, listening, rating, converting (from mp4), deleting, making playlists, adding and removing music from my mp3 players (one for regular listening, including podcasts, and one for exercise, including techno). 

I've actually had to stop downloading music for the past month or so, because I just don't have time to listen to it all.  I realized yesterday that I had downloaded the entire catalog of one indie label early this year, and I had yet to listen to one song.  So, I'm slowing down.  I just looked, and I have 799 unrated (meaning I've never listened to them) songs on my laptop (that I've only had since August).  You see my problem. 

So, in the grand scheme of time-wasting, you can see that a small step like having to sit at the table to work will make a big difference.